Game of Cards#
FRANCIS UNDERWOOD: I’ll call.
LITTLE FINGER: A bold move. We know our dear friend Francis is one to bluff but I can’t bring myself to criticize the results of his …
FRANCIS UNDERWOOD: (to camera) He’s going to say a lot of words right now that I can’t be bothered to hear, but if I pretend to listen he’ll be sure he’s convinced me of something.
LITTLE FINGER: … or you die.
CERCEI LANNISTER: Raise.
TYRION LANNISTER: Oh in the name of the Gods, Cercei, have some sympathy for the poor. Fold.
CERCEI: Maybe if you took a break from your whores you’d be able to stay in the game more often.
TYRION: Oh, I’m sorry, I had to make other arrangements since my sister’s cunt wasn’t available to me.
FRANCIS: (to camera) I like him.
CERCEI: Awful little troll.
FRANCIS: Now, now, let’s not get caught up in any drama while we’re having a perfectly nice game. Arya, the bet’s to you, and Doug, bring us all another round.
DOUG STAMPER: Yes, sir.
ARYA STARK: I hate this game.
VICTOR PETROV: You should take more a little more joy from life.
ARYA: Shut up! Call.
VICTOR: I see she is a fighter. Also small, and not bright.
ARYA: (muttering) Victor Petrov, Ser Ilyn Payne, Tywin Lannister…
DAENERYS TARGAYEN: I tap five mountains and a forest for Broodmother Dragon.
Silence. Tyrion squints at Daenerys’ cards.
TYRION: No, I don’t believe our friend is playing the same game. Where did you even get those?
FRANCIS: I must have left them out. Daenerys—
DAENERYS: Khaleesi.
FRANCIS: Khaleesi, forgive me, would you like to go over the rules again?
Daenerys throws her cards across the table and stands as Doug comes back in with drinks.
DAENERYS: No! I tire of this nonsense. I will take my leave. Doug! Will follow me? Do you not yearn to be free?
DOUG: No, ma’am.
DAENERYS: Very well.
She leaves.
CLAIRE UNDERWOOD: I’ll speak to her.
She follows Daenerys.
VICTOR: Wonderful! I’m sure that will be very helpful.
TYRION: Are you sure we’re not related?
LITTLE FINGER: I would be careful before being sure of anything.
JON SNOW: I will call.
VICTOR: With what? Let us speak plainly, you brought almost nothing to the table and you have less now.
JON: I swear as a brother of the Night’s Watch, I’m good for it.
VICTOR: Oh yes? And none of us here have broken a vow recently, have they?
CERSEI: I’ll loan him the money.
TYRION: I wouldn’t take that. A Lannister always raises interest rates in the fourth quarter.
CERSEI: And you wonder why father hates you?
TYRION: Not really.
FRANCIS: (to camera) I knew we had something in common. Daddy issues always make the man.
LITTLE FINGER: I believe prudence would best guide the day here. I will fold.
VICTOR: I will call the bet. Francis, your guests always seem to have a habit of fighting with each other.
FRANCIS: Yes, but they usually do it more politely. I’ll call too.
Claire returns.
FRANCIS: How did it go?
CLAIRE: We’re at war.
VICTOR: Excellent! Let us show our cards now.
They show their hands.
LITTLE FINGER: Jon, if you’re going to bluff, you have to raise.
JON: I wasn’t bluffing!
ARYA: With a pair of fours?
JON: I played honorably with what I had.
CLAIRE: Jon, it’s okay to fold now and then.
JON: IT IS NOT!
FRANCIS: I respect that, Jon, and you’re always welcome at my table.
VICTOR: Yes, please join me to play in Russia when you can. You will love the weather.
CERSEI: I can give you a twelve percent APR for two years.
ARYA: Why is Doug staring at me?
DOUG: What? I wasn’t.
ARYA: I’m getting my own drink.
She leaves.
DOUG: No, I’ll get it…
He follows her.
TYRION: Well, it looks like to the Victor go the spoils. Unless we consider the Broodmother Dragon.
FRANCIS: I don’t think we should consider the Magic cards fair play here.
TYRION: No? If I was betting on a dragon versus three kings, I’d wager on the dragon. Five kings, even.
ARYA: (from the kitchen) Get your hands off—
CLAIRE: Doug? Is everything okay in there?
Arya comes back in with a glass of milk.
ARYA: Everything’s fine.
CLAIRE: Is that blood on your hand?
ARYA: Must have cut myself.